America's Armed Forces will have a busy future, busier than . How did you like my speech? he asked. The guy touches his elbow and winces in genuine pain. It is not merely for today, but for all time to come that we should perpetuate for our childrens children this great and free government, which we have enjoyed all our lives. The nation is worth fighting for, to secure such an inestimable jewel., We have before us an ordeal of the most grievous kind. Gen. William Thornson, Make it too tough for the enemy to get in and you can't get out. Unknown, Never interrupt your enemy when he is making a mistake. Napoleon Bonaparte, Basic Flying Rules: Try to stay in the middle of the air. He pulled out a pair of running shoes and started putting them on. Your speech shouldn't be ad-libbed and it shouldn't be read verbatim. delivered 30 September 2011, Fort Myer, Virginia. WARNING: Tons of dad jokes lie ahead. He started this website while transitioning out of the Marines, and since has recruited several other Marines to help him work on the Marine Approved website. Mr. Gorbachev, open this gate! Each generation must kindle the flame of freedom, 4. . Thanks for sharing Brandon. continue to believe in them. When a flight is proceeding incredibly well, something was forgotten. You can update your choices at any time in your settings. Thank you very much Dan. And weve collected the best funny retirement wishes and quotes here to help you have a laugh with your friend whos retiring. Awesome page, I came out of the US Army in 92. "It is better to live rich than to die rich.". Forever, and forever, farewell, Cassius! [Answered]. When a man retires and time is no longer a matter of urgent importance, his colleagues generally present him with a watch R C Sherriff. Wear those anchors with pride and humility.". Retirement is an occasion that is very special for most people. There must be no room in our ranks for whimperers and cowards, for panic-mongers and deserters. Thank you to each of you. For instance, Take the simple phrase, "Secure the building." Relief to be finishing work, looking forward to new adventures or having a rest. Sample Military Speech: Military Change of Command Speech Title/s of honoured guest/s, fellow officers, comrades, It seems to me that the vital bits of life are sandwiched in between constant bouts of preparation. From the commanding general to the enlisted soldier, here are some military retirement speeches from different branches that can serve as inspiration for your retirement speech. . Without the responsibilities of standing duty, getting underway, and 60+ hour work weeks, I was afforded the time to reflect upon my Naval career, and in particular, Continue reading "Military Retirement Ceremony: It's Not About You" Danielle is one of the strongest women I know. Almost from Reading books on military themes are a great Its hard to believe 2022 is coming to Sign up for our newsletter and receive the mighty updates! Ive lit the blue touch paper and found theres nowhere to retire to. Doctor Who. From this experience Chief Bales taught me the value of keeping promises, even when things get messy. But try not to squander those precious opening moments with a litany of shout-outs that apply to only one person. If so, this collection of military retirement toasts will help you says something heartfelt and punchy. . A soldier and a marine were walking through the woods one day when they came upon a bear. Comment: Great metaphors and good use of humor mixed with emotionally rich content. who have taken time from your crushing schedules to be here. -E.E. Tear from his brows the laurels he has won. He also acknowledges people without forcing his audience to listen to every name. Eat up! To the Soldiers surprise, the Marine was laughing about it. *********************************************************************. Willie is the future of the senior enlisted core and will be a CMSgt one day if he decides he wants it. I hope you enjoy it. His service began in 1966 when as a 20-year-old-man he was drafted into fighting in the Vietnam War. effective relationships and mission accomplishment. IT'S TRULY A GREAT DAY TO BE A SOLDIER. Recently, a neighbor turned 100, and a big birthday party was thrown. Trust is the key ingredient to effective relationships and mission accomplishment. We should take nothing for granted.". If we cant stay here alive, then let us stay here dead., I dont want to get any messages saying, I am holding my position. We are not holding a goddamned thing. get messy, No matter what task youre doing, do Practice it Beforehand Practice makes the man perfect. "Sincere thanks for the big sacrifices you've made for our nation.". Take care and happy retirement. Nor should you belittle the business. "There's one thing I always wanted to do before I quitretire!" - Groucho Marx. In his free time, he enjoys hunting, hiking, running, shooting guns, and reviewing gear. This list of funny retirement wishes is perfect for anyone in your life, & is guaranteed to bring smiles. Do not go near the edges of it. Even more, I took his words to heart and tried to model my actions in the same manner; no matter what task I had, I tried to do it the best I could. And Im sure that there may be some in the audience that may have felt that I have missed some excellent opportunities, but now is my time to retire. Although he died in March of 2013, his unmatched work-ethic and love for our county are infused within me. He asked, What does it feel like to put so much work into something that well likely never use? I used the occasion on that cold November day as a teaching moment. One liner tags: attitude, motivational, retirement, work. Helping you shinewhen the spotlight is on you. thats all they want. One suggestion on the structure is to use a comparison over time. . Every military branch thinks that theyre the best, the most important, and in their own way the hardest working. . The average age of people living in our military retirement community is 85. Best of luck in your new journey in Georgia. USA: Choppers Our basic plan of operation is to advance and to keep on advancing regardless of whether we have to go over, under, or through the enemy., You are about to embark upon the Great Crusade, toward which we have striven these many months. Comment: Probably the greatest military retirement speech ever made. The problem is that leaders who are high in courage, but low in consideration are often those we wish would get in minor car accidents. Well I have. As an Amazon Associate, I earn a commission from qualifying purchases at no extra cost to you. Now, lets try it again! . I had destroyed all trust; they no longer told me how they were doing, shared any personal details, or gave any extra effort. Thank you Xavier and Joshua, my two awesome sons. But, Id really hate to waste this speech I wrote, so Ill take just a few more minutes of your time. More than just a wish, our enemies have the capability and desire. Online Speech Bank. Tell at least three stories that make a point about service to your country. I told the reporter, In fact, we use these missiles 365 days a year. We will stand and fight here. We are going to twist his balls and kick the living shit out of him all of the time. I didnt want them to get injured too severely, just bad enough where they couldnt come to work for a while. But the key to a great retirement speech is to tell one or maximum of two stories and go all out with that. Where you and your 4 team members are solely responsible for safely and effectively servicing and sustaining the most destructive weapon in our nations arsenal. Use them in a card or to say in person to someone who is about to retire. So when you know of someone about to retire you might want to add a bit of fun to such a big moment with a funny retirement message. Retirement can be daunting and a bit scary. Alison, joined by her son, at her husband's recent retirement ceremony. It was discovered my team had not followed procedures correctly, and in fact, had failed to tighten several important bolts. We are advancing constantly and we are not interested in holding onto anything, except the enemys balls. The Marine insisted that since he was in the aisle seat he would get it for him. Amy, Chris, and grandsons Tyler and Spencer, I would also like to recognize your support, because it is families like you who enable us to do what we do every day. Amy, I know there were some absences during some of your key milestones growing up. Know that your love and support has contributed to your dad's success. I know you are very proud Most of you would agree that our mission is as important as ever. Teamwork is essential; it gives them someone else to shoot at. Every time you borrow money, you're robbing your future self. You can easily change the wording to suit your situation. Because this crowd is pretty big, Ive divided you into four Over the course of the last 20 years, I have thrown my body, mind, and my heart into getting the job done. 26. Ive learned the hard way, that the way we treat our fellow Airmen matters. . Gen. McKiernan Retirement Speech. Comment: A wonderful blend of humor and passion. forever, but it has not changed their dreams. flame of freedom, Dont be the leader people hope get The best time to start thinking about your retirement is before the boss does Anonymous. And that includes many 1. Youre special people. Douglas MacArthur - April 19, 1951 - text "I now close my military career and just fade away, an old soldier who tried to do his duty as God gave him the light to see that duty. A retired husband is often a wife's full-time job. into a car wreck . A lot of the jokes on this list I heard while I was in the Marines, but I want to give credit to our friends at ralleypoint.com and unijokes.com. [Answered]. Continue to look for ways to reach out to them and You see no matter what rank we hold, we do not have the right to take away someones dignity. If you know the retiree has a great sense of humor and is taking retirement lightly, you can use funny retirement wishes to say congratulations. Use these funny wishes to show someone youre happy for them as they retire but also can have a joke and some fun with them about it. Soldier: WTF, you had air conditioners? You can help make those dreams Finally Group 4 is all those whove heard were having two When You Retire, by Tree.Cards When you retire, you get to sleep more, It is just like every other day. Keep your promises, even when things get messy, 2. Ask the Navy to secure a building and they will turn off all the lights and lock all the doors at 1700. I want you to relish this moment, to feel honorable, a sense of accomplishment, to reflect back and remember and then I want you to exhale. Retirement speeches can be tricky, there is no doubt about it. If you are still struggling to create a speech and the deadline looms, to make life easier we have examples of retirement speeches. The best part about retirement is that you don't have to worry about getting caught for doing nothing. That way I could get a vacation from seeing their faces and from their toxic leadership. On behalf of the company and my colleagues, I wish you good luck and full success in future endeavors. I once was asked if I was an English Major, I replied "No, just an AmericanSergeant." Worse Punishment? He was delayed so the priest decided to say his own few words while they waited. The key is to be crisp, self-deprecating and relatively brief (10 minutes max as a general rule). Illustrious knights, generous defenders of the Cross, remember the example of your fathers who conquered Jerusalem and whose names are inscribed in Heaven., I am amongst you at this time, not as for my recreation or sport, but being resolved, in the midst and heat of the battle, to live or die amongst you all; to lay down, for my God, and for my kingdom, and for my people, my honor and my blood., You will, by the dignity of your conduct, afford occasion for posterity to say, when speaking of the glorious example you have exhibited to mankind, Had this day been wanting, the world had never seen the last stage of perfection to which human nature is capable of attaining. 6. But also sometimes fear about the future and what will come next. I particularly liked the way she deferred introductions until the latter part of her speech, Keep your promises, even when things The troops you lead: Never give up on those you are blessed to lead. Navy and CG Say HOOOOOYAH! Cummings This site contains affiliate links. On previous visits, she noted that women customarily walked about 5 paces behind their husbands. . She is kind, smart, and hilarious. For this, thanks and gratitude will never be sufficient.". Do you have change for a dollar? Thanks Matt. The Army will post guards around the place. "Retirement is not a life without purpose; it is the ongoing purpose that provides meaningfulness.". It needs to look like your speech took some effort to write. As a result, my team stopped communicating with me. Same food, I guess we will have turkey tomorrow. Add some lighthearted sarcasm and entertaining tidbits by drawing on famous retirement quotes and sayings from comedic characters, Marvel heroes, favorite reality stars, and more: Bowery King: "You're not very good at retiring. Then life would begin. The hardest part of leadership is getting people to want to do what needs to be done. And I hope the day will come soon when all parts of our society do for young minorities what the Army and the other armed services had been doing for young men and women of all color over the years.". We must never let the weight of this combination endanger our liberties or democratic processes. It is much more difficult to fly there.--Air Force saying, War is God's way of teaching Americans geography. Ambrose Bierce. LinkedIn and 3rd parties use essential and non-essential cookies to provide, secure, analyze and improve our Services, and to show you relevant ads (including professional and job ads) on and off LinkedIn. And in this battle we shall break the enemy and bring salvation to our people, tried in the furnace of persecution, thirsting only for freedom, for righteousness, and for justice., Let civilian voices argue the merits or demerits of our processes of government; whether our strength is being sapped by deficit financing, indulged in too long, by federal paternalism grown too mighty, grown too rampant, by morals grown too low, by taxes grown too high, by extremists grow too violent . Military Retirement Ceremony Address. Time goes a little bit slower and memories become a little sweeter. Awesome speech! It rained last night and the rain leaked all over the tent. Retirement is just a never-ending vacation! by Susan Here's a humorous retirement speech I helped a friend write. August 11, 2019. 5. Military jokes! His name is Hank Snow. Even his son turned up. In fact, 2 years ago a reporter from New York magazine asked those very questions while doing a story on nuclear weapons here at F. E. Warren. And although he stopped crying, we were quickly reminded that he wasnt potty-trained! Im going to tell you something my EPRs left out. I smiled and said, Sure was a lot of em, huh sir?. However, try to avoid getting carried away thanking 50 individuals; your talk is for more than just a few people. "How lucky I am to have something that makes saying goodbye so hard.". The doctor asks him to touch his knee and. The result of our efforts will be unclouded glory, and a durable peace., For the service you have done in this great struggle in which we are engaged I present you sincere thanks for myself and the country. Reproduction of any part of this website without direct permission is prohibited. For as long as wars have been fought, great military leaders have been able to use the power of the pulpit to motivate their troops. Helping you shinewhen the spotlight is on you. Congratulations. Samuel Johnson Not much is going on. 81.37 % / 159 votes. Martin Dempsey - September 25 2015 - US Army, "I have both mentors and proteges here. We have before us many many long months of struggle and of suffering. If you're looking for retirement party at work ideas, start with decoration planning. Comment: This speech made history as the general elected president provided a cautionary warning. Thank you Captain Provencio for your kind words and for officiating my ceremony. Our goal is not the victory of might, but the vindication of right; not peace at the expense of freedom, but both peace and freedom, here in this hemisphere, and, we hope, around the world. "John Wick: "I'm workin' on it." - John Wick: Chapter 2. Need some help with retirement party planning? . Thank you commanders, chiefs, family, friends, fellow maintainers, and members of the Mighty Ninety for coming to my retirement ceremony. Although more sweet than funny, the poem is from the point of view of the coworker. 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